Avnei Eitan

According to an unwritten Israeli law, one must vacation in the North during the month of August and in Eilat during Chanukah.

But rebels that we are (why do I hear snickering from the audience? ;-)), we like to mix it up a bit, and so, as you will recall, we spent Shabbat Chanukah 5669 in Achziv.

And then this year, we decided to raise the stakes and spent a long Chanukah weekend in the Golan.

Specifically, we stayed in a beautiful tzimmer (refers to one of the many cabins/bungalows/vacation homes which dot Northern Israel) in Avnei Eitan, a moshav in the southern Golan Heights.

And now, without further ado, here are some scenes from our trip. As always, click on the pictures for a closer view.

The Kinneret, as seen through our car window on a very rainy and foggy day

 Celebrating the 7th night of Chanukah in Avnei Eitan

Feeding the calves in Avnei Eitan

In short, we had a wonderful time and highly recommend Avnei Eitan as a vacation spot. Also, once again, YZG and I would like to thank our parents for a very special weekend.

And now back to work and school.

Those groans you hear in the background are the kids digging out their knapsacks…

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Update: For more Chanukah pictures, check out Batya’s post.

Winner takes all

Don’t let the title fool you.

This isn’t yet another dreidel post.

Instead, it’s about that other popular Chanukah game - the one that we here in TRLEOOB* refer to as “Who Won?”

As everyone knows, dreidel is a game of chance, which involves at least a modicum of skill. (I mean, one does have to know how to spin it.)

In contrast, “Who Won?” is based on… pure luck.

Sounds thrilling, no?

Here’s how you play:

• 1) Each night of Chanukah, the players note whose candles lasted the longest. The player with the longest lasting candle is declared that night’s winner.
• 2) Some families – like ours – have two winners each night: one for the people who light on candles and one for those who light on oil.

Yes, it really is that simple!

In the interest of full disclosure, I should admit that I don’t quite see the game’s attraction. But since a significant portion of the Shiputzim family plays “Who Won?” every. single. night. of Chanukah, I have to assume that this game is way more exciting than it appears.

So, go ahead and try it at home. I’m sure that you’ll be very glad you did.

After all, “Who Won?” provides, uh, seconds of enjoyment for the entire family…

!חנוכה שמח

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*TRLEOOB=the real life equivalent of our blog

Aliyah memories: Make yourself at home edition

The following incident took place soon after we made aliyah, when I had yet to master the local mores.

But now, some 11½ years later, I’ve obviously become quite the expert on Israeli social conventions. And if you believe that, I have an unfinished bridge to sell you…

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A then-little boy who lives across the street had spent the afternoon here in TRLEOOB* playing with a Shiputzim son.

But now it was suppertime, and the kid showed no sign of leaving.

I was still used to American-style playdates, where the mothers arrange everything – including the pickup time - in advance. However, we had been in Israel long enough for me to realize that the system works very differently here.

So I decided to try the direct approach.

ME: You have to go home now.

KID: No, my mother said I don't have to be home until 7:00.

ME: {at a loss} Um, yeah, but we're about to eat supper.

KID: {unconcerned} Oh, that’s okay. I'll just play on your computer while you're eating...

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*TRLEOOB=the real life equivalent of our blog

Dreidel (Dreidel());

Shavua tov!

Some people play dreidel for money. Others use chocolate chips, toothpicks, or little colored candies.

But here in TRLEOOB*, we take a rather recursive approach and play dreidel for… dreidels.

In other words, the “pot” consists of dreidels of various sizes, shapes and colors, and the winner is the player who ends up with the most dreidels.

What does your family use for your dreidel games?

Here’s a selection from the Shiputzim family’s dreidel collection:

If you look very carefully, you can see which dreidels predate our aliyah and which ones were acquired here in Israel.

!חנוכה שמח

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*TRLEOOB=the real life equivalent of our blog

A seasonal Chanukah party

The kids were adorable; the performance was beautiful; and the mothers surreptitiously shed a few tears.

But nevertheless, in many respects, the recent gan Chanukah party was rather disappointing.

I mean, consider the following flagrant breaches of gan Chanukah party protocol:

1) In stark contrast to last year’s paean to pyromania, this year’s party was surprisingly free of fire hazards. The requisite purple lights and their electrical cords were well out of the kids’ reach, and the gannenets lit the chanukiyah themselves. Moreover, they used tea lights rather than glass jars filled with olive oil, and they blew out the flames a minute or two later. (More on this chanukiyah below.)

2) Although the gannenets dutifully obeyed the edict from on high that gan must be dismissed early on the day of the Chanukah party, the kids were sent home at the relatively civilized hour of 12:00 – rather than at the more typical but highly inconvenient 11:00.

3) The party actually started more or less on time and ended a mere 1¼ hours after it started.

4) Many of the classic elements were missing, including the Giant Dreidel Piñata, the Building a Chanukiyah Out of Wooden Blocks, and the Joint Parent-Child Arts & Crafts Project.

5) Very few of the kids are eldest children. Thus, there was only one (1) pushy mother blocking everyone else as she attempted to video her precious offspring from every. single. angle.

And yet, in spite of these egregious lapses, the Gan Party of 5770 does have one claim to fame.

In years to come, it will surely be remembered as the only Chanukah celebration to feature a… tinsel-festooned chanukiyah:

“We wish you a merry, er, Chanukah…”

Third time’s a charm

Here in TRLEOOB*, we take a rather mixed approach to seudah shlishit (aka shalosheudes) on short Shabbatot in the winter.

In principle, we try to wash and have lechem mishneh – even on the earliest Shabbat. But then, each member of the family does something different.

Some stop after the challah and wait for after Shabbat  to eat a real meal (i.e. Melaveh Malkah). Others have things like chocolate spread (see how Israeli we’ve become!), peanut butter and jelly, assorted salads, hard boiled eggs, and nuts. Then there are those who dine on leftovers from Shabbat lunch – such as deli, schnitzel, and even cold chicken.

So, how does YOUR family handle seudah shlishit in the winter? Do you:

• Skip it altogether?
• Hold that one can be yotzai with Torah learning?
• Make do with just fruit or cake?
• Wash and have some bread but nothing else?
• Wash and have a very light meal?
• Partake of a traditional seudah shlishit with all the trimmings – fish, salads, quiches, pashtidot, etc.?
• Enjoy an ice coffee, as you lord it over everyone around you that you’re a yekke** – or married to one - and thus only wait three hours…

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*TRLEOOB=the real life equivalent of our blog

**This doesn’t apply to us. As I noted here, we wait 5½ hours.

A new computer and HH

We recently acquired a new computer here in TRLEOOB*:

Note the “Go Fish”-themed mouse.

As you can undoubtedly see on the monitor, someone’s in the middle of a [fictional] game called “Doorknob”. The  software developer – who, coincidentally, is also the hardware designer and engineer - tells me that “Doorknob” has ten levels and is geared for players between the ages of five and thirteen:

“[A certain 14-year-old of our acquaintance] could also play, but it probably will be a little bit too easy...”

Apparently, this computer doesn’t have Internet access, but if yours does, you can check out the latest edition of Haveil Havalim both here and here.

Special thanks to Batya for including Malke’s guest post about finding Heblish on Rakevet Yisrael.

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*TRLEOOB=the real life equivalent of our blog

A figment of his imagination

Note: The following post was inspired by one of Baila’s recent Facebook statuses.

YZG insists that he grew up watching something called “Mutual of Omaha’s Wild Kingdom” and that it was one of his favorite TV shows.

But I say that he made the whole thing up.

To back his claim, he showed me a whole slew of websites dedicated to the alleged show - including the Wikipedia page, which asserts that it ran from 1963-1988 and was then revived in 2002.

But I believe they done her in that YZG is probably behind each of those sites.

He even tried to prove his case by downloading an episode, but – surprise, surprise! - “Mutual of Omaha’s Wild Kingdom is not available for download”.

How convenient.

Those of you who know us in real life will, no doubt, point out that it makes sense that only YZG remembers this show. After all, a program about animals is exactly the kind of thing which would appeal to YZG but most definitely not to me.

But I prefer my theory – namely, that the show is a figment of his imagination.

So, please tell me, did YOU ever watch “Mutual of Omaha’s Wild Kingdom”?

Before you answer this question, I should warn you that if you answer in the affirmative, I’ll know that YZG made you an offer you couldn’t refuse…

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P.S. A reader suggested that I explain that this post was meant as a joke.