The Our Shiputzim medical research team announces the discovery of a heretofore undocumented condition.
Known as comb-o-phobia, this odd syndrome mainly affects boys, from early childhood until their late teens.
The primary symptom involves a reluctance or, in extreme cases, an outright refusal to brush or comb one’s hair. In addition, patients frequently mutter inexplicable phrases, such as:
“What’s the problem? I brushed my hair a few days ago, for Shabbat…”
“What do you mean, ‘don’t forget to pack my brush’? It’s not like I’m gonna use it while I’m away or anything…”
“I can’t comb my hair. It’s too short. I just got a haircut.”
“I can’t comb my hair. It’s too long. I need a haircut.”
Furthermore, many patients have also been diagnosed with an obliviousness to holes in their clothes.
Researchers have yet to determine the condition’s causes and are actively working on finding a cure.
In the meantime, mothers around the globe have reported that simple home remedies – including arguing, yelling, reasoning, discussing, and convincing - have little to no impact.
If you – or someone you love – suffers from comb-o-phobia, please feel free to share your, well, hair-raising stories in the comment section…
Flash will comb his hair if I tell him too, but will then immediately mess it up with his hand "so that it doesn't look too neat" (to which I usually mutter "don't worry, no chance of that").
ReplyDeleteBoys don't need to brush their hair!!!
ReplyDeleteRaizy - Upon reading this post, a certain delightful young man of my acquaintance said, "I brush my hair whenever [my mother] tell[s] me to. But not now, of course, because now my hair is short, and there's nothing to brush..."
ReplyDelete"Anonymous" - I have it on very good authority that your mother disagrees with that statement...
:-)
How do you know my Mother?
ReplyDeleteOn a related topic, some boys don't like getting hair cuts.
ReplyDeleteMy middle doesn't need to comb his hair. He just needs to be sure to rinse out shampoo, conditioner... combing immediately after showering would probably do it. Truth is, I don't pay much attention.
But the son with the shaggy hair ... I notice him...
"Anonymous" - Let's just say that we go way back... :-)
ReplyDeleteLeora - I've suggested to a certain curly-headed boy I know that if he'd comb his hair, I'd be less likely to notice how desperately he needs a haircut...
:-)
Hilarious! I had three younger brothers.
ReplyDeleteIlana-Davita - Why am I not surprised that this phenomenon can be found around the world? :-)
ReplyDeleteIn fact, in "Marling Hall", one of Angela Thirkell's highly recommended Barsetshire novels, an old governess amuses her new charges with stories about one David Leslie, who used to - gasp! - cut the teeth off his comb (brush?) so he wouldn't have to comb his hair...
Way back?
ReplyDeleteI am anonymous!!!