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Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Life’s deepest mysteries

Ah, summer vacation.

A time for introspection, reflection, and contemplation.

A time to ponder some of life’s deepest mysteries – most of which pertain to being the Anglo parent of Israeli offspring.

For instance, consider these unfathomable enigmas:

1) Even Niyar U’Misparayim” (literally, “Rock, Paper, and Scissors”) is the Hebrew equivalent of, well, “Rock, Paper, Scissors.” (Sorry, but no word on how to say, “lizard, Spock”… :-))

But here’s the strange part.

You see, traditionally, the game begins with a sing-song recitation of the following:

.אבן נייר ומספרים
.המנצח בין השנים
.אחת, שתים, שלוש

Translation: Rock, paper, and scissors./ The winner of the two./ One, two, three. (No, it doesn’t sound any better in the original…)

Which is - needless to say - long, cumbersome, and unwieldy.

And thus, ever resourceful, Israeli kids came up with a shortened version:

.אבן ג’וק

Yes, the literal translation of “even juk" IS “rock cockroach,” and no, I have absolutely no idea what’s the kesher. (Loose translation for the Heblish-impaired: What do cockroaches have to do with anything?)

In fact, I even tried turning to the experts - i.e. a couple of the Shiputzim kids – for help.

However, they simply shrugged and said that they “don’t know but it’s just a kitzur (abbreviation).”

Which, IMNSHO, was less of an explanation and more of a restatement of the question, but in a situation like this, one takes what one can get…

2) As if the whole jukim-as-shorthand thing is not perplexing enough, it turns out that the world the country the adolescent segment of the population is divided into two groups:

  • Those who run on over to Misrad HaPnim (the Interior Ministry) on the very day that they turn 16, in order to receive their teudot zehut (identity cards).
  • Those who don’t get around to taking care of this uniquely-Israeli rite of passage until their tzav rishon (army induction paper) arrives and/or until their parents nag them enough and finally force them out the door…

Laughing out loud

Do YOU know the answer to either of these baffling riddles of Israeli life?

6 comments:

  1. My kids now have kids of their own playing this game but they used to say אבן, נייר ומספרים which came out in a one word abbreviation: evenyahoo
    ;o) Thanks for the nostalgia!

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  2. Had a good laugh, our youngest was DEFINITELY in the second category of the teudat zehut getters-I think he went two days before his tzav rishon.

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  3. I guess ours fits into the first category as he could not wait to get his TZ and be legally allowed to earn money....
    awaiting the tzav rishon....


    RCT

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  4. Risa - Haha! The first time I heard it, I asked the kids, "Yahoo? What does that mean?" :-)

    Malke - When one of the Shiputzim sons went to Misrad HaPnim, he asked a friend if he wanted to go too, but the friend said no. He had just turned 16, and it would be TOTALLY uncool to go so soon after his birthday... :-)

    RCT - His cousin was just the opposite... :-)

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  5. I can top you in the TZ department! My son needed a new passport, and the clerk offered to get him his teudat zehut even though he hasn't received a letter and won't turn 16 for a couple of weeks.

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  6. MiI - Wow! I'm very impressed... :-)

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